AGE IS BUT A NUMBER

Well ive been thinkin bout my boyfriend and i. We've been dating for almost 2 years.  He asked me out when i was a sophmore and he was senior.  Ya, we're 2 years different.  It didn't dawn on me then, but now i think bout it, wow he's 2 and a half years older than me.  I cringe when i hear young girls going out with dudes who r like 2, 3 years older, and yet im one of them.  However i dont see him as a man who's two years older than me, instead i see myself his age and him my age.  I guess i see myself too mature.  i feel as if though i dont belong here, as if though im stuck at a school tht are filled with younger peers. Im with my boyfriend and i feel like i am his age, like the way you people feel with a gf/bf thats ur age.  thats who i feel with ryan, tht im a 19 yr old.  When him and i are together, i dont feel immature nor stupid, but instead him and i can always joke away or have mature discussions tht most teenagers ages 14-17 hardly talk bout.  Really though, i feel like im in a jail, a place i dont belong.  Then i tell myself, Alexis, youre only 17, you are a high school.  But age is but a number.  Yes im 17, but i dont feel like i am.  My bf and i are 2 and a half years in difference, yet i see him and i as the same age.  I guess it seems like a big deal (the whole age thing), but i believe once i 18, it wont seem tht big a deal. idk...now im just rambling!!!!
--lexis

TO BE,OR NOT TO BE 3.1.64

I know most of you have heard me talk bout this, but i find it very entertaining...
To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause: there's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscover'd country from whose bourn
No traveller returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action. - Soft you now!
The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my sins remember'd. So ya here's the soliloquy that most famous of Shakespeare.  Ya it took me like a good 30 minutes to paraphrase it, but wow, i can honestly ssay its truly worth it.  Hamlet brings up a topic that although it is very popular, we have not been able to answer. The underlying question:  Is it truly worth it to live and suffer what life brings us, or is it better to just "simply" end our lives and rid all problems?  I do emphasize the word "simply" because in reality, we can simply end our life, but what hold us back from this simple task?  Hamlet answers with the idea that we are all cowards.  We are all cowards of the unknown.  He questions that if we die, is it the kind of "dream" where nothing occurs and thats just the end, or is it a "dream" whether we possibly and unknowing set ourselves up for a even more suffering in the afterlife? This is truly the unknown question we fear.  Therefore, we are cowards.  He then realizes the depressing idea that although we choose to live and suffer, the question still looms over our lives--that what we work for now we nonetheless end with death.  It  is then that we must face our fear and find out, still however, the question remains unknown. 
So ya, id like to know your opinion bout Shakespeare's idea, what "dream" do you believe happens after death? The "dream" of nothingness or the "dream" of unknown suffering to come.
--lexis 

the end of the beginning, is the beginning of the end

Senior year! wow we're gonna graduate in a few months and most of us wont see each other again.  I know we try to shun this sad idea, but its reality.  Most of us will look at this day as a bittersweet event, but we have to realize this is seriously only the beginning.  Ya it may seem that life as we currently know it will end, but honestly WE SHOULD BE TTLY EXCITED!!!!! ya its the end of high school, but the beginning of the 50+ years ahead of us! This will  mark a new beginning, the beginning to continue school and find our own pathway in life.  We can no long follow our friends around the campus, but instead create a new route to our own individual life.  We currently think high school is wat life is all about: the drama, the crushes, the enemies, and the crazy chaos...but as we walk down the football field with the golden ticket in our hand, all these characteristics that make high school wat it is will disappear.  We will no longer have enemies and we will probably no longer walk arm in arm with our best friends.  With the golden ticket in hand, the gateway will know be opened as we become independent and do what we have to do to get through life.  Dont get me wrong, some of us will keep in touch with a few of our great friends, but alot will fade away in their own world.  I seek individualism  once i have the holy grail in hand.  I look forward to the future, and keep past memories in mind.  I dont see this step in a negative manner, but instead the path that i must take to reach for the stars.
--lexis

GIRLS RULE...AND WELL BOY TOYS R COOL!!!

So you prolly heard me read this out in class. I recently got a nerf gun and well battle with my sister and boyfriend. i know it may sound lame...but ITS ACTUALLY TTLY COOL! i then began to realize that wow, we girls have been deprived from our childhood. Yea i know we were given barbies and my little ponies...but in my opinion...THEY ARE SO LAME!! Like wats so fun bout making your barbie talk and play with doll houses when you can get cool remote control cars or NERF GUNS!!!! Seriously, the night my sister and i got the nerf gun, we built forts and obstacles out of the couch cushion and pilliows! Not to mention it was ttly funny when my dog Missy would walk right through the "battlefield" and we'd shot her...kinda funny since she didnt acknowledge tht she was gettin shot at as a target. but ya, i seriosuly think boys had the cooler toys when it came between girls and boys.  Ive actually broken out of the shell of "a girl" and actually like doing activities most often done by males...like i said, im currently plannin a date with my bf to go paintballing. im ttly excited!!!
overall, Im actually jealous...here we were with lame toys, and now tht im 17, my final year as a kid and now im enjoyin my childhood...lol! It definately like to hear your agreements or disagreements bout boy toys being cooler than girl's. =]
---lexis